More Quotations on life, love, happiness, sorrow and things in general

Distance, n.  The only thing that the rich are willing for the poor to call theirs and keep. ~ Ambroce Bierce  The Devils Dictionary 1906  More from the Devil's Dictionary

When I think of all the sorrow and the barrenness that has been wrought in my life by want of a few more pounds per annum than I was able to earn, I stand aghast at money's significance. ~ George Gissing, The Private Papers of Henery Ryecroft, 1903

It's interesting that the industry has invented new ways to lose money when the old ways seemed to work just fine. ~  John Stumpf, president of Wells Fargo & Co., the second-largest U.S. mortgage lender

 One of the biggest changes in politics in my lifetime is that the delusional is no longer marginal. It has come in from the fringe, to sit in the seat of power in the Oval Office and in Congress. For the first time in our history, ideology and theology hold a monopoly of power in Washington. Theology asserts propositions that cannot be proven true; ideologues hold stoutly to a world view despite being contradicted by what is generally accepted as reality. When ideology and theology couple, their offspring are not always bad but they are always blind. And there is the danger: voters and politicians alike, oblivious to the facts. ~ Bill Moyers, a journalist-commentator for the Public Broadcasting Service in a speech to Harvard Medical School in December 2004

Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy. ~ H L Mencken, A Book of Burlesques

Education is the process of casting false pearls before real swine. ~ Irwin Edmund  (1896-1954)

 I have found little that is good about human beings.  In my experience most of them are trash. ~ Sigmund Freud 

Love is not the dying moan of a distant violin-it's the triumphant twang of a bed spring. ~ S J Pearlman

He that hath no fools, knaves or beggars in his family was begot by a flash of lightening. ~ Thomas Fuller (II) Gnomologia, 1732

Young people do not perceive at once that the giver of wounds is the enemy and the quoted tattle merely the arrow. ~ Scott Fitzgerald, The Crack-Up, 1945

Next to the wound, what women make best is the bandage. ~ Barbey D' Aurevilly

In matters of religion and matrimony I never give advice, because I will not have anybody's torment in this world or the next laid to my charge. ~ Lord Chesterfield Letters, 1765

Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself. ~ One of Murphy's Law

A woman occasionally is quite a serviceable substitute for masturbation. ~ Karl Kraus

Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them. ~ Samuel Butler (II) Notebooks, 1912

It is better to waste one's youth than to do nothing with it at all. ~ Georges Courteline, La Philosophie de Georges Courteline 1917   

Experience is a good teacher, but she sends in terrific bills. ~ Minna Antrim, Naked Truth and Veiled Allusions,1902.

Nothing is more conductive to peace of mind than not having any opinion at all. ~ Litchenberg, Aphorisms, 1764-99

One of the unpardonable sins, in the eyes of most people, is for a man to go about unlabelled.  The world regards such a person as the police do an unmuzzled dog, not under proper control. ~ T H Huxley, Evolution and Ethics, 1893

A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. ~ G B Shaw

If you can't annoy someone there is little point in writing. ~ Kingsly Amis

Happy is the man who is hated on his own account. ~ Jean Rostand, Journal d'un caractere, 1931

The trouble with born again Christians is that they an even bigger pain the second time around. ~ Herb Caen

I like pigs.  Dogs look up to us.  Cats look down on us.  Pigs treat us as equals.  Sir Winston Churchill

Heavens, but the nicest of men are slippery as eels. ~ Mary Dawson, head of the women's division of the Democratic National Committee to Mrs. Rosevelt in 1933

So tonight to shush you how about I say I have an administrative bone to pick with God, boo.  I'll say God seems to have a kinda laid-back management style I'm not crazy about.  I'm pretty much anti-death.  God looks by all accounts to be pro-death.  I'm not seeing how he and I can get together on this issue, he and I, boo. ~ David Foster Wallace  Infinite Jest

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination. ~ Oscar Wilde

Half the population no longer reads the newspapers; plainly they are the more clever half. ~ Gore Vidal

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying that I approved of it. ~ Mark Twain

The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.  If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened.  But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself. ~  Friedrich Nietzsche

Politicians are like diapers.  They both need changing regularly and for the same reason.  ~Author Unknown

A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin. ~  H.L. Mencken

If God wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates.  ~Jay Leno

The problem with political jokes is they get elected.  ~Henry Cate, VII

Democracy is the art and science of running the circus from the monkey cage. ~  H.L. Mencken

I have a theory that the truth is never told during the nine-to-five hours. ~ Hunter S. Thompson

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?  ~Author Unknown

Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them good. ~ H. L. Mencken

Confronted with the impossibility of remaining faithful to one's beliefs, and the equal impossibility of becoming free of them, one can be driven to the most inhuman excesses.  James Baldwin

When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe it.  ~Clarence Darrow

Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public. ~  H.L. Mencken

Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.  ~  H.L. Mencken